Pandora

Got more figuring to do. I will explain here...but later, I have too much to do already for the time I have.

Ok, I have a brief moment before I go volunteer this will be brief. I wanted to hear Dave Barnes cause it was on my mind. I thought, maybe I ought to go to my Dave Barnes channel, then. But, I knew what would play there, each channel plays according to what its listeners say they like, so instead I wanted to hear what others lstened to or liked since my taint aka preferences had lessened on by Tal Bachman radio station, and it played Dave Barnes, huh? Perhaps it is because I had a station that showed my preference, but why if then did it not play Dave Barnes on his station? Which rarely happens. Likewise, on the Tal Bachman channel it is usually mostly stuff LDSaints listen to. But, I had stated my preferences on facebook for classical music so it made sense when it played classical LDS music. That fit with my notion that music was determined by what we said or searched publically, it was a basic equation to determine preference, nothing more. My fascination with reliably being able to hear music I prefer waned when my mind caught up to what my heart was thrilled with. But, if it was correct then preferences would be in order and delineated.

It helped that a stranger commented on how odd it is that facebook has access to enough to show us our history, it makes sense that a good fortune teller could, if they were so motivated, come to know us personally, having never spoken to us.

And the songs played on pandora were not defined by a computer choosing if and then, but by a person who had observed enough to know our preferences.  Even the mere mention of Tal Bachman and Dave Barnes will effectively link the two, and thereby change what is my percieved preference.

A friend who understood this quite well used to randomly toss out key words that would cause certain, entirely uninteresting ads to appear. She also mentioned wanting to alter her playlist on pandora. I was interested, but did not, then, pay much attention...as with most things, I may be slow, but I do figure them out. On xfiles and old anasasi guy said, if it happened there is evidence, the earth records everything for us.

Someday, my delusions will be proven true or false, if they are false, that will still be true. :)

Start of a song

You saw it here first, huh?

Cause it doesn't exist yet.

So, I can't  make you do or feel something you won't.

But, I'm so sure you will, you will love me, no doubt about it if you had the chance.

So purposefully I'm kept from you, but they can't really hold me back
And someday soon you'll need to show me what I already know.

So, I cannot make you love me.

I won't even try.

Giving up is not in my nature like loving me's in yours.
So, someday soon you'll need to show me what I already know.

Oh, oh, oh what do I know oh oh
Oh what we both know,uh oh, now we know.

Too many

There are far too many people out there to consider oneself, and yet, every action labels and distinguishes us. Me? I'm the one whose action is to escape being noticed or distinguished. I am just here for the body. Criminey. I do not even like chocolate.

Is it working?

Some told me once that it works, but it is like getting a tatoo on your face, others see it before you and they ask

I refuse to believe I had anything to do with it, even if I wanted something, that does not make me responsible, does it?

Every action that produces a result started as an idea, but this one was almost too far fetched to become, without a ton of faith, and consider a tiny speck can move a mountain.

It is crazy that I even need to know, but faith is the evidence. Maybe faith is a  foreign concept, but once I figure this all out, watch it...

Back to the board

I just need to dump my thoughts somewhere. But, know I intend no format.

We can make mistakes which means we have deviated from what we intended.

This is the same thing I think when I repeat on echo sort of back to good...

Back, huh?

What was good, and if I am not able to turn my latest mistake into something good then everything subsequent is wrong, too. But, part of me can remember although mentally it seemed perfect, was that even my word for it, or just an idea that I adopted and tried to achieve.

Ok, th I s is the hardest moment. Tight after you rubbed the lamp and the inevitable genie will surely grant your wish, what is it? You must have a wish or why summon the genie at all? But, what is it? Crud. I suppose it is a matter of soul searching still, I suppose I wish to know what I should wish for, for starters, but does that use up my wishing? Crud again. I ought to have been more prepared for this. I should have known exactly what I wanted or else time lets me alter it to fit my needs.

I wonder if wishes work like everything else, more success comes from using them for another anyway.

I know now. There never was a good better than now.

My wish is that you find peace and all that matters is me. Pretty selfish, though.

Yes, I want do not want to alter any one though, though it sounds exaftly as cyboric to clear a mind, but one time a friend wrote me the absolutely best art once about actually searching the baren wastelands of his soul to find sun sourched earth and dust, and a huge chasm, and he heard my name being called out. So, in a sense I gave purpose by filling a void.  Though, actually I did nothing. This was all his mind.

But, I know that I cannot run away from a problem, and there is no lesser problem only different and the problem only exists in my thoughts anyway, or does it?

This is something I need to try to understand, where am I? Am I a thought I or a body or a struggle or I really must entertain the thought that a body can actually hold more than one will so what do I mean by peace of mind, an agreement that cannot be forced. Hmmm it sounds like marriage.

Shakespeare comes out. "To the marraige of two minds..." but the heart is not a mind at all.

Ok, I need sleep. That isn't my great wish either, though.

I wish you actually loved me, and cared enough to overcome that obstacle. But, I do not want to bend you to me, I want you to come by your own choice. I wish for you, more than anythin, be content...with me. That seems like it would make me happy.

I think Jesus loved his Heavenly Father enough to be able to accept a terrible sacrifice.

Great. Now, my thoughts are being sabatoged and forgotten and replaced by this: https://youtu.be/xz32I_GbpeU

Big fishies

Big fish in a little pond meets a guppy in the ocean.

As guppy grows they have very little in common anyway.

The fish is a goldfish and adapts to the size of environment.

Fish meets whale who is big by any standard.

Movie idea

The trouble with movie ideas for me is that I do not have that something that gives,me enough patience to become obsessed enough with an idea to commit myself to it, to the point that I do not start working onvthe next new shiny idea,when it crooks it's finger (I apologize if you do not speak English that whole crooking of fingers is just a way to say "come here" meaning I am tantalized by the new ideas to the point that none to this point have obsessed me enough to stay focused).

I think a good stories lies in using time travel, like almost every good franchise has, to not interfere. Which we know it never could have or we would have kniwn about the possibility since the begining of time. In my story man kind was clearly smart enough to recognize patterns and want to sort of do their part of inventing a car by making sure the wheel need not be reinvented. I really liked how this idea of Longer term, multi-generational improvement is explored on Stargate atlantis with the Hofa drug. We might not achieve what may become a reality for the future. I spend my time devoted to long expired human life because I hope for an imortal existance. So, anyhow,  time travelers were sensed and though they could not be called a sure thing, the belief in them and knowledge of discovery was passed on in the form of stories, ones that devolved into diety.

Uh, time to make lunch, unless I could travel back in time and make luch for everyone so I could sit and type. Ugggh!